screaming on a hill

  I killed off parts of my self. once in middle school and I don't "sing anymore". and at age 17 because I didn't feel like I was growing up much. I invisioned invicerating a Goldilocks looking character. and then ...uh. I wasn't the same. is that ultra masking? it's just a smoldering hole. I assume one should be a little over the top when role playing, and not drull "yes I want to grab the sword, please give dice" and not, sit there and act like I'm telling a story. I couldn't do that. maybe in text, role play chat rooms. or if I ever have to entertain a child. "i ain't playing dolls with ya kid" or, the singing, just sit on a bus and just make up lyrics on the fly. and be jovial about it. the singing embrassed a friend. I also had this giant feather duster in my locker when at middle school. I would pretend it jumped out at me and I fight it. nobody found it amuzing, so I stoped.

 I forgot blogger is attached to your google. and not your facebook. what is the one with facebook? I don't know if I'd really use this under this name. but I think maybe people will find it. use it in place of LJ, because I assume it's not as active, and that is not my life anymore. I can't go back to that life. most of those people. and the face most of it was tied to websites that don't exist anymore, for communities I'm not part of. this. so long go. I'm remenising and it hurts very bad. not to mention, just my drama. I have the other blogspot. Kaiyodei. that was to be my new brand name, I've ruined the Kuwaizair one, and I'm possibly going to ruin Kaiydei why did I think this was linked to facebook?